I want quality spam!

Why do all these spam people think I would like a replica rolex watch? Why do they think that if they send me 57 messages a day that will convince me? Why doesn’t anyone ever send any quality spam? Like spam that tells you where to get a nice cheap pair of Peter Alexander Pjs, or good books at bargain prices, or cheap opera or theatre tickets. That would be the kind of spam I’d like to receive.

I wonder if anyone sends Bible spam…

Why can’t people use spam for good instead of evil?

14 Responses to “I want quality spam!”

  1. John Dekker Says:

    Ugh! I get heaps of Bible spam. Give me rolexes any day. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. missmellifluous Says:

    No way! What’s Bible spam? You don’t mean those cheesy little powerpoint presentations with fluffy animals telling you how much God loves you, do you? They Suck! (with a capital ‘s’ apparently!)

    I am hoping for quality spam. You know, well thought out articles, links to places you could purchase good theological tapes or sermons, discount Bibles…that kind of thing. Where is that kind of spam?

    Meanwhile, I’ll be sure to forward my 57 rolex messages a day to you.

  3. John Dekker Says:

    I had a quick check in my yahoo account , but the only interesting spam I could find was an article entitled “Rapture Hype and Hypocrisy” by Dave MacPherson.

  4. missmellifluous Says:

    Wow! You really do get Bible spam. Let us know when you get a good one. I’m intrigued.

  5. kim from hiraeth Says:

    I’ll share some of my good spam with you.

    I have won the UK Lottery every day now for several months–sometimes multiple times a day!

    My loans have all been approved.

    This morning I was awarded a $1000 Visa gift card.

    I was invited to receive a classic watch replica, alerted to the biggest cash jackpot on the ‘net, invited to see how much I can save on my prescriptions, and offered health information that, due to my gender, I have no real need of.


  6. Ellen Says:

    My spam is all about losing weight and tickets to theme parks and winning Vegas jackpots!

  7. Paul Says:

    ๐Ÿ™‚ I don’t get comment spam – not even on the two WordPress blogs (at last!) – even trackbacks! – but it relies on having a server installation. So possibly not much use to you, I’m afraid.

    How much can you add to a wordpress.com blog? There are pretty good anti-spam options – akismet is supposed to do most of what you need, and I think that’s available to you, isn’t it?

  8. one4jc Says:

    I have won MULTIPLE gift cards to everything from Home Depot, Target, Red Lobster to Macy’s.

    Every Mortgage I have ever wanted is approved at less than 6% interest.

    Any Prescription medicine I want is also available.

    Oh the travel agencies and job “offers” I have gotten to start my own business!

    I have gotten several offers to receive free Bibles though.

  9. John Dekker Says:

    I think the spam-blocker on this blog is already quite good enough. /roll eyes/

    I also tried commenting on Ellens blog, and my comment hasn’t appeared. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Is there anything I can be doing about this?

  10. Rebecca Says:

    My favorite spams are the Nigerian ones that tell me that a rich widow on her deathbed is leaving me $30 million dollars. Wow! I’m RICH!

  11. John Dekker Says:

    Rebecca, you need to read this article:

    “I sent out five emails at first to some Christian brothers in the United States with an offer of one million dollars if they would simply let me transfer five million to their bank account…

    I keep sending out emails, but no one is responding! I cannot understand what I’m doing wrong. Here I am offering people a million dollars, but no one is accepting the offer.”

  12. Paul Says:

    John. Oh, yes. Sorry – a sore point, I guess.

  13. cbnm Says:

    can i copy ur articles

  14. Anonymous Says:

    i win in a lottery every day twice
    I’m so rich now, asian mogusl want give me all the money, once a week
    is this any kind of quality? ๐Ÿ˜‰

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